A great article from the Mayo Clinic outlines some of the most common concerns and obstacles about having sex during pregnancy. In summary, rest assured that, as long as your pregnancy is progressing without complications, sex is perfectly safe from conception to delivery. Having sex definitely won’t increase the risk of miscarriages or harm the baby in any way.
Though a real problem couples (and especially women) face during pregnancy is (1) maintaining a desire for sex and (2) making sex comfortable and satisfying, especially during the latter months of pregnancy. The natural aches, sickness, and fatigue that often accompany sex may hamper your libido. Fear of disappointing your husband may add stress. The awkwardness of your growing belly will literally come between the two of you, making certain positions no longer comfortable and climaxing more difficult. With these challenges in mind, here are a few tips for pregnant women to make the nine-month adventure a little less rocky:
- First of all, it’s perfectly fine if your desire for sex diminishes. Your body is changing for good reason, and it wouldn’t be natural for you to act and feel as you did before. It’s common for husbands to also experience a diminished libido until after the baby is born.
- Consider Orhadox Jews. During a woman’s period, she’s considered ceremonially unclean, which means that not only are she and her husband not to have sexual relations, but they’re not even supposed to touch each other. While this is no-doubt a challenge, I’ve heard of a Jewish couple who reported that this period of separation strengthens their feelings for each other and makes sex all the more exciting.
- Don’t lie on your back. When a pregnant woman lies on her back, the weight of the baby may pinch an important blood vessel in her back that is essential for the health of the baby. Stick to positions that put you on top or facing your husband.
- Remember that he’ll still find you sexy. The altered figure of a pregnant woman is hardly a deterant to a man who’s in the mood. As long as you still take time to present yourself, he’ll still want you as much as he did before (and he probably won’t complain about your increased bust size). As a man, I’ll add my two cents that there’s something beautiful about the shape of a pregnant woman. In any case, this new shape of yours is your husband’s fault, so he’d better live with it!
- If orgasms no longer seem attainable, talk to your husband about other ways that he could help you experience sexual fulfillment. While stimulation gels are often not recommended for pregnant women, vibrating rings may help add the extra sensation you need. Many couples are able to help each other climax without necessarily having intercourse. But if all else fails, remember the happy Jewish couple and count your blessings. Of course, there’s much more to love than just sex. Celebrate this speical time together as a way of developing other parts of your romantic relationship.